{"id":5941,"date":"2014-04-22T05:45:28","date_gmt":"2014-04-22T09:45:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/staging.communify.me\/newvinegrowing\/?p=5941"},"modified":"2019-06-07T13:38:53","modified_gmt":"2019-06-07T17:38:53","slug":"reward-or-encourage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/staging.communify.me\/newvinegrowing\/reward-or-encourage\/","title":{"rendered":"Instead of carrot or stick, do you reward or encourage?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Have<\/a>
Have you earned a gold star for your accomplishments or for your efforts?
Photo by Pewari used under Creative Commons license.<\/figcaption><\/figure>
\nSeveral years ago, The New York Times ran a column by Amy Sutherland,\u00a0who’d learned the reward system of animal trainers<\/a> and put it to work on her husband. She\u00a0praised\u00a0him for putting his clothes in the hamper, for example, and ignored his dirty socks on the floor, for example.
\nI’ve thought of that concept often \u2014 that it’s easier to reward\u00a0doing something than to reward *not* doing it, and maybe punishing the bad behavior doesn’t pay off.
\nThen a Deepak Chopra article got me thinking about just what we should reward. Is it the result or the process?
\nChopra’s article headlined “Which Leads to More Success, Reward or Encouragement?”<\/a>\u00a0says in part:<\/p>\n
\n
\n
\n

We are a society that puts a huge emphasis on rewards, and a school of psychology is based on it. In behavioral psychology, an American invention, there are two ways to stimulate a response from someone, either reward them or punish them. This two-way mechanism works with lower animals \u2014 dog and horse trainers, for example, use food treats to reinforce the behavior they want \u2014 so it should work with humans, or so the logic goes. If you want a certain behavior out of prisoners, for example, behaviorists advise giving privileges as a reward for obeying the rules and punishment for disobeying them.<\/p>\n

The problem is that human behavior isn’t that simple, because we have inner lives. A dog or horse will be content with a steady supply of food and a warm place to live. Those things are barely the minimum for meeting human needs. There is another duality besides reward-punishment that plays a huge part in the career arc of every successful person: encouragement-discouragement.<\/p>\n

To be encouraged means literally to acquire courage, while to be discouraged is to give in to fear. Soldiers need courage to charge into battle, and without it, they won’t. Every person conceals a level of fear and anxiety inside, however, and in order to meet life’s challenges and crises, we all have to discover how much courage we have. This is a prime example of why reward-punishment is inadequate on its own. To face your fears isn’t a pleasant experience that anyone would consider a reward \u2014 it’s much closer to being a punishment. Yet in the long run, many accomplishments in life come our way only if we overcome fear and acquire courage.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Instead of withholding the gold star only for those who get to the result, Chopra’s saying we should reward the attempt. Support those bravely facing fear or adversity or challenge.<\/p>\n

Similarly, an article on kqed.org encourages praising children for their efforts, not just calling them smart.<\/p>\n

Katrina Schwartz’s article “Giving Good Praise to Girls: What Messages Stick”<\/a> talks about research\u00a0by\u00a0Carol Dweck<\/a>, a professor of psychology at Stanford who studies praise.<\/p>\n

\n

\u201cMy research shows that praise for intelligence or ability backfires,\u201d said Dweck, who co-authored a seminal\u00a0research paper<\/a>\u00a0on the effects of praise on motivation and performance. \u201cWhat we\u2019ve shown is that when you praise someone, say, \u2018You\u2019re smart at this,\u2019 the next time they struggle, they think they\u2019re not. It\u2019s really about praising the process they engage in, not how smart they are or how good they are at it, but taking on difficulty, trying many different strategies, sticking to it and achieving over time.\u201d<\/p>\n

But what some might not know is that this paradox is strongest for girls.<\/p>\n

Dweck\u2019s research, which focuses on what makes people seek challenging tasks, persist through difficulty and do well over time, has shown that many girls believe their abilities are fixed, that individuals are born with gifts and can\u2019t change. Her research finds that when girls think this way, they often give up, rather than persisting through difficulties. They don\u2019t think they possess the ability to improve, and nowhere is the phenomenon stronger than in math.<\/span><\/p>\n

… If adults emphasize that all skills are learned through a process of engagement, value challenge and praise efforts to supersede frustration rather than only showing excitement over the right answer, girls will show resilience.\u00a0It also might help to provide a road map to correct the gender imbalance that already exists in fields requiring math and science, jobs that often involve setbacks, \u201cfailing,\u201d and overcoming challenges.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

\"Carrot<\/a>
Carrot and stick aren’t the only two choices. You also need to decide what to reward with that carrot.
Photo by Kaptain Kobold used under Creative Commons license.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Encouragement can tell you\u00a0that just because something is hard doesn’t mean you aren’t capable. Encouragement pats you on the back for\u00a0committing yourself to the challenge.<\/p>\n

My improv friends will appreciate that I think the answer here is “Yes, and …”<\/p>\n

Reward and celebrate the results. When you’ve worked long and hard, it’s nice to feel recognized. It’s something that powers me into the next long hard slog.<\/p>\n

And in the meantime, encourage the effort it takes to get there. Praise commitment to trying even when it’s tough. Be a cheerleader for colleagues, employees and friends who are pushing themselves.<\/p>\n

What do you respond to \u2014 encouragement for your efforts or praise for your results? <\/strong><\/p>\n

Which do you give more often?<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Several years ago, The New York Times ran a column by Amy Sutherland,\u00a0who’d learned the reward system of animal trainers and put it to work on her husband. She\u00a0praised\u00a0him for putting his clothes in the hamper, for example, and ignored his dirty socks on the floor, for example. I’ve thought of that concept often \u2014 that it’s easier to reward\u00a0doing…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":11551,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[58],"tags":[114,166,668,817,1029,1442,1819,1896],"yoast_head":"\nInstead of carrot or stick, do you reward or encourage? - Newvine Growing<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/staging.communify.me\/newvinegrowing\/reward-or-encourage\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Instead of carrot or stick, do you reward or encourage? - Newvine Growing\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Several years ago, The New York Times ran a column by Amy Sutherland,\u00a0who’d learned the reward system of animal trainers and put it to work on her husband. 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