Leading up to Thanksgiving, each day I will blog about what I’m doing to be more grateful. I invite you to join me, and to share your thoughts, observations, suggestions and ideas.
Day Nine: Being grateful for what you have instead of wanting what you don’t have
Over the years, I’ve read various studies about how watching television encourages us to want more — whether it’s absorbing the advertising or comparing our lifestyles to those we see on the screen, the tube shapes our desires.
For example, University of Zurich researcher Bruno Frey found that watching TV made people more materialistic. (An article in Popular Psychology News has more details.) Researchers at Hunter College analyzed data going back to the 1950s and found television was associated with increased debt.
In a society that made Paris Hilton a role model for being a super rich party girl, it’s easy to find yourself on the aspirational treadmill.
Wouldn’t you be happier with a nicer, newer car? A bigger house? A cool new cell phone?
Living in New York is in some ways good at limiting the desire for more — in a small apartment with no basement, attic or garage, you can only bring in so much more. And yet, living around so many rich and/or fashionable people, it’s hard not to compare. Her shoes are nicer than mine. Their apartment is better. Why does he get a Town Car with a driver when I have to take the subway?
Yesterday I wrote that I’m looking at the things I hate to try to find something in them to be grateful for.
I’d like to try that same sort of redirect on the things I find myself yearning for.
I want a bigger apartment — but I’m grateful that I get the experience of living in New York. Real estate is more expensive here in part because so many people want to live in this amazing city, so the trade off is less space and fewer closets.
I want someone to pay me to write a book about farmers markets — and I’m grateful to find such pleasure in writing, shopping at markets and cooking.
I want a summer home on a beach someplace — but I’m grateful we got to take a great vacation to Block Island last summer where we got beach time with our friends Rob and Lara. I’m also grateful John and I are talking about a long-term plan that might involve more beach time.
Can you find something to give thanks for in the things you want?