I heart New York.
John and I made a very intentional move to New York City more than four years ago and it’s amazing here. I look out my office window at the Empire State Building every day and sometimes still can’t believe this is my life.
People from all around the world travel to vacation in our city. They even pay to take a tour bus past our apartment building.*
World-class musicians and authors come through town daily, and John can draw inspiration from A-list art any day of the week.
And don’t even get me started on the food …
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KY1RdKhsXJg]
But when I read a recent article in the parody newspaper the Onion headlined “8.4 Million New Yorkers Suddenly Realize New York City A Horrible Place To Live,” part of the reason I laughed out loud repeatedly was that it was SO true.
Fair warning: the language is PG-13. But if you can handle the language, read on for some choice excerpts from a fictitious article about every last New Yorker decamping at the same time:
3 million New Yorkers reportedly left the city because they realized the phrase “Only in New York” is actually just a defense mechanism used to convince themselves that seeing a naked man take a shit on a park bench is somehow endearing, or part of some shared cultural experience.
AND
When fleeing New Yorkers were asked if they would miss the city’s iconic landmarks, most responded that Central Park is just a pathetic excuse for experiencing actual nature, that the Brooklyn Bridge is great but it’s just a fucking bridge, that nobody goes to the Met anyway, and that living in a dingy, grime-caked apartment while exhaust fumes from an idling truck seep through your bedroom window isn’t worth slightly bigger bagels.
The reality is John and I pay twice as much in rent for our one-bedroom Brooklyn apartment than we did for our monthly mortgage payment (including property taxes) in Ann Arbor. We have about 750 square feet, no garden or roof access, and we pay extra for an off-site storage unit.
Many things about our New York lifestyle are amazing, but are we willing to contemplate buying in a city where $595,000 is considered a great value for a two-bedroom apartment? The online payment calculator tells me with 20 percent down — that’s about $120,000 — we would have monthly payments of about $3,400 including taxes and the building maintenance fee.
For perspective, in many parts of the country, $120,000 is not down payment on an apartment. It’s the total price of a home.
I love New York. But do I love the culture, the food and the people enough to cope with the cost of living, the crowds, the noise and everything else that comes with New York life?
TBD.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0UjsXo9l6I8]
Other posts about hometown and where you live:
* It’s the Grey Line Brooklyn loop, not some shady Kramer tour of the Seinfeld New York.